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"A Better You" Your 7 Days Program To Self-improvementIt might take a little coffee or probably a few rounds of beer or any other booze you could get your hands on when it comes to relaxing after a hard day's work. Well, yeah I'm guilty about that one as well, unless I'm caught dead wearing a lampshade over my head after a few rounds of vodka… half-naked! Okay, bad example and I apologize to everyone reading this after getting nightmares about me in that state of drunken stupor. Just don't ask how it happened, please. But what's really interesting is that how do people go through the usual part of life when faced with vein-popping stress? I mean, the new age thing like Zen or yoga is one of the good things and it actually works. Is there room for the intellectual side of people who can actually smell the roses-in-a-can while on the move? It kind of had me thinking that there really must be something in this 'mind-over-matter' thing. Humor is indeed the best medicine there is whenever you are. I mean anyone can pay good money to listen to a comedian just to make you wet your pants after laughing so hard. Despite of what's been happening, and to those who has gone though the ordeal, it's better to just laugh while facing the troubles with a clear mind than anger with a clouded vision. One of my favorite celebrities of all time may have to be Woody Allen. Now this is one guy who gives you the in-your-face bluntness that he pulls out with gusto, even without even trying. You can talk just about anything with a man, and he's bound to mock the subject and you'll end up laughing rather than being upset about it. Woody Allen has this to say: 1. "Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons." It sounds good to me, I mean the practicality of all things does involve money but it doesn't have to take an arm and a leg to get it. 2. "I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government." 'Nuff said. 3. "There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?" This happens to be one of the classic ones. I mean the issue about life's little problems isn't all that bad, until 'he' shows up. Sure, relationships can get complicated, or does have its complications that probably any author about relationships is bound to discover it soon. We follow what our heart desires, unless you're talking about the heart as in the heart that pump blood throughout your body. 4. "Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions." And if you want more, just keep on asking! Be all you can be, but it's not always in the Army. I often see myself as somewhat contented with my life the way things are, but of course it's hard to think of anything else when where are real issues to be discussed. Still I aspire for something deeper and more meaningful. So we're all pelted with problems. Honestly it shouldn't even bother or even hinder us to becoming all we ought to be. Aspirations as kids should continue to live within us, even though it would be short-lived or as long as we could hold on to the dream. They say you can't teach an old dog new tricks… or can they? 1. What do I really want? The question of the ages. So many things you want to do with your life and so little time to even go about during the day. Find something that you are good at can help realize that small step towards improvement. Diligence is the key to know that it is worth it. 2. Should I really change? Today's generation has taken another level of redefining 'self', or at least that's what the kids are saying. Having an army of teenage nieces and nephews has taught me that there are far worse things that they could have had than acne or maybe even promiscuity. So how does that fit into your lifestyle? If history has taught us one thing, it's the life that we have gone through. Try to see if partying Seventies style wouldn't appeal to the younger generation, but dancing is part of partying. Watch them applaud after showing them how to really dance than break their bones in break-dancing. 3. What's the bright side in all of this? With so much is happening around us there seem to be no room for even considering that light at the end of the tunnel. We can still see it as something positive without undergoing so much scrutiny. And if it's a train at the end of the tunnel, take it for a ride and see what makes the world go round! The Blarney Stone is a historical stone, or actually part of the Blarney Castle in Ireland where it was believed that kissing the stone can grant you the gift of gab. Yeah, it seems strange in this day and age, but who are we to question tradition? It's not like I'm saying that Santa Claus doesn't exist (OOPS!). There is so much to know about conversation that anyone, even I, could ever realize. You can go though watching talk shows; radio programs; clubs dedicated to public speaking; ordinary conversations; certain rules still apply when it comes to interaction through words. It may sound tedious, I know, but even though it's your mouth that's doing the work, your brain works twice as hard to churn out a lot of things you know. So what better way to start learning to be an effective communication is to know the very person closest to you: yourself. 1. What you know. Education is all about learning the basics, but to be an effective speaker is to practice what you've learned. My stint as guest at every Toastmasters' meeting I go to taught me that we all have our limitations, but that doesn't mean we can't learn to keep up and share what we know. 2. Listening. It's just as important as asking questions. Sometimes listening to the sound of our own voice can teach us to be a little bit confident with ourselves and to say the things we believe in with conviction. 3. Humility We all make mistakes, and sometimes we tend to slur our words, stutter, and probably mispronounce certain words even though we know what it means, but rarely use it only to impress listeners. So in a group, don't be afraid to ask if you're saying the right word properly and if they're unsure about it then make a joke out of it. I promise you it'll make everyone laugh and you can get away with it as well. 4. Eye Contact There's a lot to say when it comes to directing your attention to your audience with an eye-catching gaze. It's important that you keep your focus when talking to a large group in a meeting or a gathering, even though he or she may be gorgeous. 5. Kidding around At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) have nothing to do with one another. But many of us with ADD develop negative thinking patterns because we become frustrated by our challenges and frequent feelings of being overwhelmed. This negative outlook then makes it even harder for us to manage those challenges and move forward. Practicing positive thinking allows people with ADD to focus on our strengths and accomplishments, which increases happiness and motivation. This, in turn, allows us to spend more time making progress, and less time feeling down and stuck. The following tips provide practical suggestions that you can use to help you shift into more positive thinking patterns: 1. Take Good Care of Yourself It's much easier to be positive when you are eating well, exercising, and getting enough rest. 2. Remind Yourself of the Things You Are Grateful For Stresses and challenges don't seem quite as bad when you are constantly reminding yourself of the things that are right in life. Taking just 60 seconds a day to stop and appreciate the good things will make a huge difference. 3. Look for the Proof Instead of Making Assumptions A fear of not being liked or accepted sometimes leads us to assume that we know what others are thinking, but our fears are usually not reality. If you have a fear that a friend or family member's bad mood is due to something you did, or that your co-workers are secretly gossiping about you when you turn your back, speak up and ask them. Don't waste time worrying that you did something wrong unless you have proof that there is something to worry about. 4. Refrain from Using Absolutes Have you ever told a partner "You're ALWAYS late!" or complained to a friend "You NEVER call me!"? Thinking and speaking in absolutes like 'always' and 'never' makes the situation seem worse than it is, and programs your brain into believing that certain people are incapable of delivering. 5. Detach From Negative Thoughts As a Webmaster, you are forever searching for ways to make more money from your website. One of the better ways to do this is to add or link some self improvement concepts into the contents. Many webmasters have found that there are a few key programs they can add on their sites for which they can honestly expect to make a few extra dollars, a few hundred extra dollars, and in some cases, a few thousand extra dollars every month. The trick to linking income from third-party programs is to carefully select programs that are relevant to your site visitors, while insuring that the program you promote does not directly compete with your own offerings. If you are giving something to your visitors that they will find useful, above and beyond your normal offerings that is considered an "added value" item. Not only will it give your customers something they appreciate, it will help them grow closer to you as a business owner. That way, there will appear a link between you and the customers to pave the way for improvement. This is helpful in accelerating the trust level that your customers have with you and your business which can only serve you well over the long term. By adding this foundation of trust, your visitors will come back to your site and buy from you again because they know that they can trust you to treat them well. On the web, more so than in brick-and-mortar, the trust factor is the most important hurdle that the small business owner must overcome with his potential customers. There are so many scams and rip-offs on the web, that an honest soul is especially appreciated. It is important to select your "added value" offerings based on the interests of your web site visitors. The closer your offerings are to the needs of your target market, the more successful you will become selling your added value products. Almost everyone have heard the hit single 'Don't Worry, Be Happy' by Bobby McFerrin. The song has a very catchy way of conveying its message of being happy to everyone. Bobby Mcferiin's simple message surely made a lot of people by telling them not to worry. Living a happy, resilient and optimistic life is wonderful, and is also good for your health. Being happy actually protects you from the stresses of life. Stress is linked to top causes of death such as heart disease, cancer and stroke. One of the better things ever said is - 'The only thing in life that will always remain the same is change', and in our life we have the power to make the necessary changes if we want to. Even if we find ourselves in an unbearable situation we can always find solace in the knowledge that it too would change. Social networks or relationships are essential to happiness. People are different, accept people for who or what they are, avoid clashes, constant arguments, and let go of all kinds of resentments. If arguments seem unavoidable still try and make an effort to understand the situation and you might just get along with well with Happiness is actually found in everyone, increasing it is a way to make a life more wonderful and also more healthy. To be happy is relatively easy, just decide to be a happy person. Abraham Lincoln observed that most people for most of the time can choose how happy or stressed, how relaxed or troubled, how bright or dull their outlook to be. The choice is simple really, choose to be happy. There are several ways by which you can do this. Being grateful is a great attitude. We have so much to be thankful for. Thank the taxi driver for bringing you home safely, thank the cook for a wonderful dinner and thank the guy who cleans your windows. Also thank the mailman for bringing you your mails, thank the policeman for making your place safe and thank God for being alive. News is stressful. Get less of it. Some people just can't start their day without their daily dose of news. Try and think about it, 99% of the news we hear or read is bad news. Starting the day with bad news does not seem to be a sensible thing to do. It's a talent that everyone has, yet they think they don't. The power of innovation. If you've ever marvelled at somebody's creative prowess, guess what, you can create and innovate too. It just takes time. Everyone is born creative. The box of crayons in kindergarten were not limited to those who possessed potential; because the truth is, everybody has potential. You know how long it took to learn to ride a bike or drive or to never commit the same mistake again? It's the same with innovation. It takes a bit of practice and a lot of time before this mind function comes easily when called. This article will teach you a few tips on how to bring innovation into your life. Don't listen to what other people say. Follow the beat of your own drum. Allowing for the input of other people will only bring cacophony to the music you are trying to make. If you have an original idea, don't waste your time and effort trying to make people understand. They won't. And the help you will probably get comes in the form of negative feedback. If all those geniuses listened to their peers, we would probably still be living in the middle ages. Spend time on it. I cannot stress that enough, although, please do not mistake this tip to tell you to quit your day job entirely. Do not. This involves some tricky time management but with a little discipline you'll be able to squeeze both in. Exercise. Take a walk. Run a mile or two. Send all those endorphins coursing through your veins. Exercising certainly clears and relaxes your mind and allows for anything to pop up. So how do you stay calm, composed and maintain self esteem in a tough environment? Here are some tips you may to consider as a starter guide to self improvement. Imagine yourself as a Dart Board. Everything and everyone else around you may become Dart Pins, at one point or another. These dart pins will destroy your self esteem and pull you down in ways you won’t even remember. Don’t let them destroy you, or get the best of you. So which dart pins should you avoid? Dart Pin #1 : Negative Work Environment Beware of “dog eat dog” theory where everyone else is fighting just to get ahead. This is where non-appreciative people usually thrive. No one will appreciate your contributions even if you miss lunch and dinner, and stay up late. Most of the time you get to work too much without getting help from people concerned. Stay out of this, it will ruin your self esteem. Competition is at stake anywhere. Be healthy enough to compete, but in a healthy competition that is. Dart Pin #2: Other People’s Behavior Bulldozers, brown nosers, gossipmongers, whiners, backstabbers, snipers, people walking wounded, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders, patronizers, sluffers… all these kinds of people will pose bad vibes for your self esteem, as well as to your self improvement scheme. Dart Pin #3: Changing Environment You can’t be a green bug on a brown field. Changes challenge our paradigms. It tests our flexibility, adaptability and alters the way we think. Changes will make life difficult for awhile, it may cause stress but it will help us find ways to improve our selves. Change will be there forever, we must be susceptible to it. Dart Pin #4: Past Experience When you hear the word “coach”, what comes first into your mind? Do you picture a basketball team with a man/woman shouting out directions? Or perhaps a football team with a man/woman pacing to and fro and calling out the names of the players? Coaching is no longer reserved to sports teams; it is now one of the key concepts in leadership and management. Why is coaching popular? Coaching levels the playing field. Coaching is one of the six emotional leadership styles proposed by Daniel Goleman. Moreover, it is a behavior or role that leaders enforce in the context of situational leadership. As a leadership style, coaching is used when the members of a group or team are competent and motivated, but do not have an idea of the long-term goals of an organization. This involves two levels of coaching: team and individual. Team coaching makes members work together. In a group of individuals, not everyone may have nor share the same level of competence and commitment to a goal. A group may be a mix of highly competent and moderately competent members with varying levels of commitment. These differences can cause friction among the members. The coaching leader helps the members level their expectations. Also, the coaching leader manages differing perspectives so that the common goal succeeds over personal goals and interests. In a big organization, leaders need to align the staffs’ personal values and goals with that of the organization so that long-term directions can be pursued. Coaching builds up confidence and competence. Individual coaching is an example of situational leadership at work. It aims to mentor one-on-one building up the confidence of members by affirming good performance during regular feedbacks; and increase competence by helping the member assess his/her strengths and weaknesses towards career planning and professional development. Depending on the individual’s level of competence and commitment, a leader may exercise more coaching behavior for the less-experienced members. Usually, this happens in the case of new staffs. The direct supervisor gives more defined tasks and holds regular feedbacks for the new staff, and gradually lessens the amount of coaching, directing, and supporting roles to favor delegating as competence and confidence increase. Consumers are individuals or households that consume goods and services generated within the economy. Since this includes just about everyone, the term is a political term as much as an economic term when it is used in everyday speech. Typically when business people and economists talk of consumers they are talking about person as consumer, an aggregated commodity item with little individuality other than that expressed in the buy not buy decision. However there is a trend in marketing to individualize the concept. Instead of generating broad demographic profile and psychographic profiles of market segments, marketers are engaging in personalized marketing, permission marketing, and mass customization. A consumer is assumed to have a budget which can be spent on a range of goods and services available on the market. Under the assumption of rationality, the budget allocation is chosen according to the preference of the consumer, i.e. to maximize his or her utility function. In 'time series' models of consumer behavior, the consumer may also invest a proportion of their budget in order to gain a greater budget in future periods. This investment choice may include either fixed rate interest or risk-bearing securities. In the context of mental health, consumer is also a term applied to describe a person living with mental illness. Literally, it is not really what is states. They are the people seeking for help in their own profile of their mentality. You can let them gain their life back on track and achieve your goal at the same time. Have you had that experience when all of a sudden you just had this huge hunch that something is about to happen, and to your surprise, that intuition was eventually translated to reality? When you feel strongly about something without logical basis to it, that's called intuition. It comes in three impressions: clairvoyance or "the third eye", sensing clearly and feeling through listening. Clairvoyance is when your eye goes beyond what it can see. This is when you know what is happening somewhere. Sensing clearly is basically what we refer to as "hunch" or "gut feel." This is the time when you are overwhelmed with a feeling and you can't explain it and all you can say is "I just know." On the other hand, feeling through listening or clairaudience is being able to "listen" between the lines. Intuition also happens at times when a certain sound, whatever it is - be it a car's honk or a bird's twitting - ushers in an intense feeling. They say only a number of people are gifted with intuition. Astrologers even insist that people born under the Scorpio or Pisces signs are naturally intuitive it almost borders on E.S.P. But studies have been sprouting left and right that proclaim that anyone can develop intuition. Why the need to develop intuition, you ask? Why not let your emotional and psychological state as it is? First and foremost, intuition promotes good communication. It makes you more sensitive to the people around you; it often keeps you from hurting those you love because you are intuitive enough to understand them. Intuition also makes you far more creative than ever. Intuition means releasing more creative juices for any means of expression. Lastly, intuition has a healing power. This healing power is not in the physical sense, but in delving deep into your soul to eradicate some negative energy buried in it. With that being said, are you ready to develop your intuition? Here are some ways to unlock this gift: 1. Hypnosis Oh yes, get yourself hypnotized. Hypnosis is not limited to watching a pendulum move back and forth. Perform self-hypnosis or you can avail of hypnotic programs that can strengthen your intuition. 2. Meditation There has been a decline in consumer confidence in the building and construction industry. This may be the same reason why many are now doing home improvements by themselves. Why not? A little knowledge of the technical aspects combined with the eye for creativity is enough to do the home improvement on your own. Why are people turning to do-it-yourself home improvements? Many construction workers who do not have a lot of experience or expertise in construction or home maintenance are out there right now trying to work on these homes across the country. As a result, homeowners are finding that the jobs are not being completed to their satisfaction. Sometimes they are even prepaying for services that do not get done or are not part of the plan. You do not have to rely and pay someone to improve your home. Why not try to do it yourself? You can enhance your home’s existing concrete surfaces using acid stains, acrylic stains, epoxy paints, and scoring techniques. If you are tired of looking at dreary gray concrete, there are some easy projects for the serious home improvement do-it-yourselfer to give your patio, driveway, garage, etc. a refreshing new look. Decorative concrete work costs double or even triple that of regular concrete. This is why many people cannot afford it. There are inexpensive ways to decorate concrete after it has cured without having to pay skilled tradesmen. Acid based concrete stains are becoming more and more popular for coloring concrete surfaces. They chemically react with the cementitious material to produce permanent color with variegated or mottled appearance like that of marble. This results in a natural, elegant looking surface. Everyone, at some point of his or her life, has dreamed of being somebody special, somebody big. Who hasn't fantasized about being the one who hits the game-winning homer? Who hasn't dreamed of being the homecoming queen? And how many times have we dreamed of being rich, or successful, or happy with our relationships? Often, we dream big dreams and have great aspirations. Unfortunately, our dreams remain just that – dreams. And our aspirations easily collect dust in our attic. This is a sad turn of events in our life. Instead of experiencing exciting adventures in self actualization, we get caught up in the humdrum of living from day-to-day just barely existing. But you know what? Life could be so much better, if only we learned to aim higher. The most common problem to setting goals is the word impossible. Most people get hung up thinking I can't do this. It's too hard. It's too impossible. No one can do this. However, if everyone thought that, there would be no inventions, no innovations, and no breakthroughs in human accomplishment. Remember that scientists were baffled when they took a look at the humble bumblebee. Theoretically, they said, it was impossible for the bumblebee to fly. Unfortunately for the bumble, bee no one has told it so. So fly it does. On the other hand, some people suffer from dreaming totally outrageous dreams and not acting on them. The result? Broken dreams, and tattered aspirations. If you limit yourself with self-doubt, and self-limiting assumptions, you will never be able to break past what you deem impossible. If you reach too far out into the sky without working towards your goal, you will find yourself clinging on to the impossible dream. Not everyone believes this but the emotional and mental aspects of a person, when combined, leads to better self improvement. Emotions love to dominate our actions and reactions, even though we do not want it to happen sometimes. The society often see emotions as a sign of weakness, so people are used to putting them aside and focusing on the rational aspects more and more. No matter how strict and logical you may be, you will always feel. One way or another, someone or something will get through you. Positive emotions are a lifelong goal for many of us concerned about emotional health and self improvement. What is more important; the amount of money you made during your life or the times you laughed out of sheer joy? People tend to put their positive emotions behind their negative feelings. This is one of the biggest problems that people come across during their lives. There is no clear way to ignore a negative experience and try to replace it with a positive one. Life just does not work that way. For example, when you were a child, if your goldfish dies, you would be heartbroken. Your parents will probably buy you another goldfish but the sorrow is still there. Things get even more complex when you become an adult. A fight with your spouse the night before will affect your entire day. You will go to work angry, tired, and your mind will wander. On the way home from work you will not notice the sun shining and you would not be tempted to stop at a roadside stand to pick up some fresh fruits and vegetables. All this because that one negative thought has contaminated the way you perceive the reality around you. You have probably come across exotic-sounding terms such as “chakra”, “prana”, “aura”, and “tantra” in your course of reading books on spirituality, sex, and healing in the New Age literature section of the bookstore. But what’s the real scoop behind these exotic vocabularies? Are All Energy Healings the Same? Chakra or energy center is a term used in Pranic healing, an ancient Hindu system of energy healing. “Prana” means life energy. “Aura” is another terminology traced to Pranic healing. Aura is a non-physical body that consists of energy, which exists along with our physical body. The aura that covers our body is said to have seven layers pertaining to the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual aspects of an individual as manifested by energy. Studying the color and thickness of auras give ideas on the state of health of individuals. Six colors are associated with aura and interpreted into six personalities. These colors are all present in an individual but one or two are more pronounced. Green – ambitious achiever Blue – spiritual peacemaker White – unconventional chameleon Red – activist Orange – creative communicator Violet - psychic Although Tantra is popularly associated with the peculiar practice of sex and spirituality, it is another method of energy healing. It comes from the word “tan” which means to spread or expand. The concept of connectedness is a recurring theme in Tantric writings on sex and spirituality. As a method of healing, spirituality and sex figure prominently. It is presupposed that the union of man and woman can reach spiritual levels during orgasm, which removes the body and mind off collected impurities. These impurities being negative energies can in turn manifest as physical illnesses. Unlike Pranic and Tantric healings, which have Hindu origins, Reiki originated from Japan. It is relatively younger than Pranic and Tantric healings having been rediscovered in the early 1900’s. Reiki stands for universal energy, an energy brought forth by higher intelligence. Students of Reiki are taught how to tap this energy to heal physical, emotional, and mental illnesses. Although Pranic, Tantra, and Reiki are all systems of energy healing, they differ in the type of energy tapped for healing: life energy, sexual energy, and universal energy respectively. The concepts of the connectedness of mind, body, and spirit; the connection of individuals to all living and nonliving things around them and to the universe; and how energy impacts physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being are some of the salient similarities of these three healing methods. Why Do People Turn to Energy Healing? "Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud, and one sees the stars."- Frederick Langbridge, A Cluster of Quiet Thoughts If you’ve placed second in a writing contest, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again? In life, you are always filled with choices. You may opt to have a pessimist’s view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take the optimist’s route and take a challenging and fulfilling life. So why nurture an optimist’s point of view? And why now? Well, optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma. On the other hand, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewife’s disorder but also a teen-ager’s disorder’ as well. Here’s how optimists are in action and researches that back up why it really pays to be an optimist: Optimists expect the best The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad events, which will last a long time and undermine everything they do, are their own fault. The truth is optimists are confronted with the same hard knocks of this world. What differs is the way they explain their misfortune---it’s the opposite way. They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case. Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. They use 'positive reinterpretation.' In other words, they most likely reinterpret a negative experience in a way that helps them learn and grow. Such people are unfazed by bad situation, they perceive it is a challenge and try harder. They won’t say “things will never get better,” “If I failed once, it will happen again” and “If I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.” Positive expectancies of optimists also predict better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles. If only self improvement advice were free and scattered around everywhere, then there will be no problem regarding life, happiness and success. But then again, this is life. And it does not work that way. What would you do if you are trapped in an environment that you do not want to be in? What if you are sick and tired of your job? What can we do to solve this dilemma? It is possible to take inspired and motivated action to survive your present situation and live the life you always dreamed of. It is not that easy though. You will have to come out of your comfort zones to discover potentials and opportunities waiting for you. You have to conquer your fear and take calculated risks. You have to stay focused and persevere despite the difficulties you will encounter. Success does not come easy. It takes heart, passion and time. Experience is also a factor. The learning you get everybody becomes your foundation. These are the things we do not need to pay for. You have to work harder, dig deeper, and sacrifice more to attain your ambitions. But no, you do not have to hate the world and feel bad when you encounter difficult situation. Just remember the Law of Attraction. If you hate the world, the world will hate you back. What can you do? Below are some free advices to help you when facing difficult situations in life. They will also serve as your guide to improve yourself. To grow spiritually in a world defined by power, money, and influence is a Herculean task. Modern conveniences such as electronic equipments, gadgets, and tools as well as entertainment through television, magazines, and the web have predisposed us to confine our attention mostly to physical needs and wants. As a result, our concepts of self-worth and self-meaning are muddled. How can we strike a balance between the material and spiritual aspects of our lives? To grow spiritually is to look inward. Introspection goes beyond recalling the things that happened in a day, week, or month. You need to look closely and reflect on your thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and motivations. Periodically examining your experiences, the decisions you make, the relationships you have, and the things you engage in provide useful insights on your life goals, on the good traits you must sustain and the bad traits you have to discard. Moreover, it gives you clues on how to act, react, and conduct yourself in the midst of any situation. Like any skill, introspection can be learned; all it takes is the courage and willingness to seek the truths that lie within you. Here are some pointers when you introspect: be objective, be forgiving of yourself, and focus on your areas for improvement. To grow spiritually is to develop your potentials. Religion and science have differing views on matters of the human spirit. Religion views people as spiritual beings temporarily living on Earth, while science views the spirit as just one dimension of an individual. Mastery of the self is a recurring theme in both Christian (Western) and Islamic (Eastern) teachings. The needs of the body are recognized but placed under the needs of the spirit. Beliefs, values, morality, rules, experiences, and good works provide the blueprint to ensure the growth of the spiritual being. In Psychology, realizing one’s full potential is to self-actualize. Maslow identified several human needs: physiological, security, belongingness, esteem, cognitive, aesthetic, self-actualization, and self-transcendence. James earlier categorized these needs into three: material, emotional, and spiritual. When you have satisfied the basic physiological and emotional needs, spiritual or existential needs come next. Achieving each need leads to the total development of the individual. Perhaps the difference between these two religions and psychology is the end of self-development: Christianity and Islam see that self-development is a means toward serving God, while psychology view that self-development is an end by itself. “Opposites attract” is a law of attraction, at least where electromagnetism is concerned. But are there laws about attraction between two people? “In a world that is full of strangers” as a line in a famous song of the 1980’s goes, is there a clear set of rules that allows two people to fall for each other? Is attraction a matter of chemistry? Maybe. According to scientists, the attraction between animals of the opposite sex is all about chemicals called pheromones. The effect of pheromones in behavior of insects is the most studied to date. It has been observed, at least in some experiments, that pheromones are responsible for communication among same species and colony of ants. The horrible odor released by skunks to ward off enemies is said to be a kind of pheromone. Some species of apes rub pheromone-containing urine on the feet of potential mates to attract them. Some scientists believe that animals (usually the females) such as insects and mammals send out these chemical signals to tell the male of their species that their genes are different from theirs. This gene diversity is important in producing offspring with better chances of survival. The perfume industry has capitalized on pheromones as a means to increase one’s sexual attractiveness to the opposite sex. Animals such as the whale and the musk deer were hunted down for these chemicals. Lately, scientists are looking into the existence of human pheromones and its role in mate selection. There are many conflicting views in the realm of biology, chemistry, genetics, and psychology. Most scientists would assert that these do not exist, or if they do, do not play a role in sexual attraction between a man and a woman. But new researches such as that conducted by Swiss researchers from the University of Bern led by Klaus Wedekind are slowly making these scientists rethink their stand. Their experiment involved women sniffing the cotton shirts of different men during their ovulation period. It was found out that women prefer the smell of men’s shirts that were genetically different, but also shared similarities with the women’s genes. This, like in the case of insects and other mammals, was to ensure better and healthier characteristics for their future children. But researchers also cautioned that preference for a male odor is affected by the women’s ovulation period, the food that men eat, perfumes and other scented body products, and the use of contraceptive pills. Does personality figure in sexual attraction? Many people nowadays are turning to “organics” and “naturals” otherwise known as herbals. The rising popularity of herbal supplements has created a new fad if not a new health lifestyle. But before you join the bandwagon, here are some things you need to know about this mean, “green” dietary supplementing machine. What is the difference between a drug and a dietary supplement? According to the definition set by food and drug administrations in different countries, drugs are chemicals that can prevent, prolong the life, treat other effects of a health condition, improve the quality of life, and/or cure ailments and diseases, or alter the function of any part or chemicals inside the body. These drugs have approved therapeutic claims. For example, paracetamol is a drug given to bring down the body temperature in fever. Ascorbic acid is indicated for the treatment of scurvy. Iron supplements are given to treat mild cases of anemia. Herbal supplements are not classified as drugs but as dietary supplements. The main difference is that they do not have approved therapeutic claims unlike in the case of drugs. Moreover, dietary supplements could either contain vitamins, minerals, herbals, or amino acids, all aimed to add to or supplement the diet of an individual. They are not intended to be taken alone as a substitute to any food or medicine. Most of the manufactured medicines we now have once came from animals and plants. Through the years, chemists isolated the life-saving or life-curing components and separated them from the harmful ones. This lead to the further drug research and drug development that lead to the production of a different variety of drugs for many ailments and conditions from synthetic sources. But still we have semi-synthetic drugs, as well as drug that more or less approximate more natural composition. Since herbal supplements are made from a mixture of crude herbs reduced into powder or gel form, and later on packaged as tablets and capsules, there is a possibility that life-threatening or at least body chemistry-altering components are still present, thus the expression of concern from the medical community. Is there a growing concern with the use of herbal supplements? Yes. With the rising popularity of using and consuming anything herbal or organic is the proliferation of fake herbal supplements that threaten to endanger lives. If that’s the case, then why are herbal supplements given drug administration approvals? One way of ensuring the safety of the people is to have all candidate drugs, food, drinks, and dietary supplements registered with the proper authority. Otherwise, they would pose more risk with these things being sold in the black market for a hefty sum. We could ensure the quality and safety of herbal supplements if they get proper classification with the food and drug administration. Moreover, people may be able to file the proper complaints in the event a worsening of health condition is proven to be linked to the use of a particular herbal supplement. When you get sick, you go to the doctor. And the doctor will, of course, prescribe medicines. You will go and buy medicines. You take them, and hopefully, you get well. This is how the health profession goes on nowadays – a cycle of diagnosis and prescription. If anyone were to give you herbs for medicine, you would probably say that that person was a quack. But nowadays, studies are being conducted to see if there are really is any merit to what is called natural medicine. Natural medicine is the use of natural methods, herbal medicines, and traditional practices to heal ailments. Every culture has a form of natural medicine. In ancient cultures, village medicine men served as the doctors of the community, passing on medical knowledge to the apprentices that followed them. Many categories of the healing methods fall under natural medicine. Among these are traditional medicine, complementary medicine, and alternative medicine. Usually, natural medicine refers to medical practices that were in place before the advent of modern medicine. This includes herbal medicine, or phytotherapy, which is prevalent in Chinese, Ayurvedic(or Indian), and Greek medicine. Upon the advent of modern medicine, many professionals discarded the use of herbs in favor of man-made medicine. The fact that these treatments are based on the healing properties of some herbs was forgotten. For example, opium, digitalis, quinine, and aspirin all have their roots in traditional medicine. Life isn’t the sweetest candy. Sometimes, when I feel like the world is just too heavy, I look around and find people who continued to live fascinating and wonderful lives. And then thoughts come popping into my mind like bubbles from nowhere – “How did their life become so adorably sweet? How come they still can manage to laugh and play around despite a busy stressful life?” Then I pause and observed for awhile… I figured out that maybe, they start to work on a place called ‘self’. So, how does one become genuinely happy? Step 1 is to love yourself. My theology professor once said that “loving means accepting.” To love oneself means to accept that you are not a perfect being, but behind the imperfections must lie a great ounce of courage to be able to discover ways on how to improve your repertoire to recover from our mistakes. Genuine happiness also pertains to contentment. When you are contented with the job you have, the way you look, with your family, your friends, the place you live in, your car, and all the things you now have – truly, you know the answer to the question “how to be genuinely happy.” When we discover a small start somewhere from within, that small start will eventually lead to something else, and to something else. But if you keep questioning life lit it has never done you any good, you will never be able to find genuine happiness. I believe that life is about finding out about right and wrong, trying and failing, wining and losing. These are things that happen as often as you inhale and exhale. Failure, in a person’s life has become as abundant and necessary as air. But this should not hinder us from becoming happy. Self hypnosis is a great tool for goal setting and self improvement. Most people are surprised at how easy it is to learn self-hypnosis. And self-hypnosis, in turn, makes a lot of things much easier. Self hypnosis is usually thought of as a person listening to an audio tape, mp3, or other mass-produced media, intended to induce a willingness to absorb suggestions centered around a specific topic such as weight loss, stop smoking, etc. Unfortunately, this kind of hypnosis is generally prepared by someone who has never met the person being hypnotized, often presenting unwanted, even unpleasant imagery and suggestions. For example, if you sunburn easily, that last thing you want to hear about is a slow walk on a sunny beach. In this case, the "self" in self hypnosis simply means that you listen to it by yourself. How do you incorporate self improvement to hypnosis? To be able to go about self improvement, there are certain aspects in you that should be addressed. Using hypnosis, the negative aspects that are serving as hindrances to improvement are eliminated. A true self hypnosis would necessarily be designed and created by the very person who will ultimately use and benefit from it. Unlike the mass-produced hypnosis, this hypnosis is made for the exact purpose the person wishes, including the precise words and phrases that mean the most to that particular person. The true self hypnosis is thus crafted by the person to suit his or her own needs. The benefits derived could only be accomplished with such a personal, one-of-a-kind hypnosis. In this case, the "self" in self hypnosis really does mean that you are hypnotized by yourself! The popularity of self-improvement books, tapes and seminars is a reflection of the universal interest we all have in overcoming our limitations, or "being the best we can be" or "achieving our full potential." Popular applications of self-improvement programs include motivation and confidence, personal relationships, sales and job performance, enhancement of sports performance, public speaking, weight control and smoking cessation. Here are some basic principles to help you determine whether such products or programs are worthy of your time and money. There is no book or program that will be an exact fit for your needs and interests. Books and group programs are necessarily general in nature. Some of the ideas and concepts may apply well to you, but others may be irrelevant or just plain wrong as applied to your own personality and life situation. Use good judgment and discrimination in following advice offered in any self-improvement program. Be wary of any program that is highly authoritarian and that tears you down, or attacks people who question what is being done. There have been many group self-improvement programs that have enjoyed a temporary burst of great popularity over the years that have been extremely damaging to some participants. The most effective program or tape would, of course, be one that is designed specifically for the individual, addressing his or her unique goals, motivation and personality. Obviously this can be done only in personal consultation with a professional person such as a psychologist and involves the cost of paying that professional person for the time it takes them to provide the individual attention required to design a program or tape tailored exactly to your needs. Suggesting a link to which you can seek for help can make things easier for you to achieve your goal. Help is on its way. Here are links that I can suggest you can visit. • Psych Web by Russ Dewey: Just as willpower is an essential factor in achieving success, at some point in time, discouragement and lack of motivation may hinder you from reaching your objective. And it is up to you, and you alone to devise techniques that will help you keep that drive within afire. It is helpful to have visual goals. whatsoever that is you are working towards, make it visual. It maybe something material like a car, or a vacation you have been looking forward to for the longest time. Take or cut out a picture of it and post it at a conspicuous place at work or at home where you can see it often. So that when you feel discouraged, this will remind you of your goal and will help you keep your spotlight. Make a contract with oneself. According to motivational researches, people who write down to-do-lists are far more triumphant in achieving their intended goals than those people who just keep mental lists instead. Putting something in writing somehow makes it more powerful psychologically speaking. This may also be the basis why most cultures have such a high regard in honoring contracts. In the contract, you may also include a certain reward that you will give yourself once you have accomplished the task. After all, everyone likes to be rewarded for completing a good job. Even a simple pat on the back, “good job”, or “thank you” may do the trick to give the person the additional push to carry on, but unfortunately, these may not always be readily available. Considering that these are also essential in keeping oneself motivated, you must learn to find a way to get that encouragement on your own through pleasing yourself. Abusive people lower your self-esteem and bring you down. Get these negative people out of your life. Surround yourself with positive people. Imitate their example. Smile amply and think happy thoughts. 1. Self improvement audio programs. One of the most effective learning tools available. In the fast paced world of today, finding time to read can be difficult. But it is easy to use otherwise wasted commuting and traveling time productively. You can use this self improvement product to transform boring train or flights into inspirational personal development and learning experiences. Imagine how much information you could take in a matter of months and what it could do to for your motivation to improve your life. There are also those self improvement Videos and DVD's. Although you may not be able to attend all the seminars and workshops that could have a dramatic impact on your personal development and growth, DVD's and Videos offer easily affordable access to the wisdom and insights of the best self motivation experts. And all this in the comfort of your own home. 2. Self improvement books & eBooks Self improvement books were traditionally the way that most people discovered the life changing potential of a commitment personal development and self growth. Most of the classic works of personal development are now also available as eBooks, as are many of the modern greats and bestsellers. eBooks are one of the easiest, most popular and economical ways to expand both your library and your mind. 3. Self improvement coaching & mentoring Self-esteem is a core identity issue, essential to personal validation and our ability to experience joy. Once achieved, it comes from the inside out. But it is assaulted or stunted from the outside in. A woman with low self-esteem does not feel good about herself because she has absorbed negative messages about women from the culture and/or relationships. The reign of youth, beauty and thinness in our society dooms every woman to eventual failure. Women's magazines, starting with the teenage market, program them to focus all their efforts on their appearance. Many girls learn, by age 12, to drop formerly enjoyable activities in favor of the beauty treadmill leading to nowhere. They become fanatical about diets. They munch, like rabbits, on leaves without salad dressing, jog in ice storms, and swear they love it! Ads abound for cosmetic surgery, enticing us to "repair" our aging bodies, as if the natural process of aging were an accident or a disease. Yet with all this effort, they still never feel like they are good enough. A workshop a set of activities designed to promote learning, discussion and feedback about a topic or event, you have achieve this with the traditional get together workshop, but online, all you need to do it logon to find other peoples views and suggestions about their life changing ways into a better self. Get better everyday Plan to do one thing that will help you improves physically, intellectually, emotionally, even spiritually. Making just one change for the better will boost your attitude from the inside out. You can actually chose what you want to change in this category first. Things you do most are the ones you need to focus on. A simple task wont take that long. Little things add up How many times have you gone to sleep at night, swearing you'll go to the gym in the morning, and then changing your mind just eight hours later because when you get up, you don't feel like exercising? While this can happen to the best of us, it doesn't mean you should drop the ball altogether when it comes to staying fit. What people need to realize is that staying active and eating right are critical for long-term health and wellness -- and that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. The more you know about how your body responds to your lifestyle choices, the better you can customize a nutrition and exercise plan that is right for you. When you eat well, increase your level of physical activity, and exercise at the proper intensity, you are informing your body that you want to burn a substantial amount of fuel. This translates to burning fat more efficiently for energy. In other words, proper eating habits plus exercise equals fast metabolism, which, in turn gives you more energy throughout the day and allows you to do more physical work with less effort. The true purpose of exercise is to send a repetitive message to the body asking for improvement in metabolism, strength, aerobic capacity and overall fitness and health. Each time you exercise, your body responds by upgrading its capabilities to burn fat throughout the day and night, Exercise doesn't have to be intense to work for you, but it does need to be consistent. I recommend engaging in regular cardiovascular exercise four times per week for 20 to 30 minutes per session, and resistance training four times per week for 20 to 25 minutes per session. This balanced approach provides a one-two punch, incorporating aerobic exercise to burn fat and deliver more oxygen, and resistance training to increase lean body mass and burn more calories around the block. Here's a sample exercise program that may work for you: * Warm Up -- seven to eight minutes of light aerobic activity intended to increase blood flow and lubricate and warm-up your tendons and joints. * Resistance Training -- Train all major muscle groups. One to two sets of each exercise. Rest 45 seconds between sets. * Aerobic Exercise -- Pick two favorite activities, they could be jogging, rowing, biking or cross-country skiing, whatever fits your lifestyle. Perform 12 to 15 minutes of the first activity and continue with 10 minutes of the second activity. Cool down during the last five minutes. * Stretching -- Wrap up your exercise session by stretching, breathing deeply, relaxing and meditating. When you are at work, do you get frustrated because things don't seem to be happening the way they’re supposed to be? You see people milling around but nothing gets accomplished. And in the daily hustle and bustle, do you feel that your goals remain just that – goals. Then maybe its time for you to stand up and do something about it. Most people are content just to stand around listening for orders. And it isn't unusual to adopt a follow-the-leader mentality. But maybe, somewhere inside of you, you feel the desire to make things happen – to be the head, not the tail. Then maybe leadership just suits you fine. Some people believe that great leaders are made, not born. Yes, it may be true that some people are born with natural talents. However, without practice, without drive, without enthusiasm, and without experience, there can be no true development in leadership. You must also remember that good leaders are continually working and studying to improve their natural skills. This takes a commitment to constantly improve in whatever endeavor a person chooses. First of all, let's define leadership. To be a leader, one must be able to influence others to accomplish a goal, or an objective. He contributes to the organization and cohesion of a group. Contrary to what most people believe, leadership is not about power. It is not about harassing people or driving them using fear. It is about encouraging others towards the goal of the organization. It is putting everyone on the same page and helping them see the big picture of the organization. You must be a leader not a boss. First of all, you have to get people to follow you. How is this accomplished? People follow others when they see a clear sense of purpose. People will only follow you if they see that you know where you are going. Remember that bumper sticker? The one that says, don't follow me, I'm lost too? The same holds true for leadership. If you yourself do not know where you're headed to, chances are people will not follow you at all. You yourself must know the vision of the organization. Having a clear sense of hierarchy, knowing who the bosses are, who to talk to, the organization's goals and objectives, and how the organization works is the only way to show others you know what you are doing. Being a leader is not about what you make others do. It's about who you are, what you know, and what you do. You are a reflection of what you're subordinates must be. Meditation refers to a state where your body and mind are consciously relaxed and focused. Practitioners of this art report increased awareness, focus, and concentration, as well as a more positive outlook in life. Meditation is most commonly associated with monks, mystics and other spiritual disciplines. However, you don’t have to be a monk or mystic to enjoy its benefits. And you don’t even have to be in a special place to practice it. You could even try it in your own living room! Although there are many different approaches to meditation, the fundamental principles remain the same. The most important among these principles is that of removing obstructive, negative, and wandering thoughts and fantasies, and calming the mind with a deep sense of focus. This clears the mind of debris and prepares it for a higher quality of activity. The negative thoughts you have – those of noisy neighbors, bossy officemates, that parking ticket you got, and unwanted spam– are said to contribute to the ‘polluting’ of the mind, and shutting them out is allows for the ‘cleansing’ of the mind so that it may focus on deeper, more meaningful thoughts. Some practitioners even shut out all sensory input – no sights, no sounds, and nothing to touch – and try to detach themselves from the commotion around them. You may now focus on a deep, profound thought if this is your goal. It may seem deafening at first, since we are all too accustomed to constantly hearing and seeing things, but as you continue this exercise you will find yourself becoming more aware of everything around you. If you find the meditating positions you see on television threatening – those with impossibly arched backs, and painful-looking contortions – you need not worry. The principle here is to be in a comfortable position conducive to concentration. This may be while sitting cross-legged, standing, lying down, and even walking. If the position allows you to relax and focus, then that would be a good starting point. While sitting or standing, the back should be straight, but not tense or tight. In other positions, the only no-no is slouching and falling asleep. Loose, comfortable clothes help a lot in the process since tight fitting clothes have a tendency to choke you up and make you feel tense. The place you perform meditation should have a soothing atmosphere. It may be in your living room, or bedroom, or any place that you feel comfortable in. You might want an exercise mat if you plan to take on the more challenging positions (if you feel more focused doing so, and if the contortionist in you is screaming for release). You may want to have the place arranged so that it is soothing to your senses. Pain may sometimes be the reason why people change. Getting flunked grades make us realize that we need to study. Debts remind us of our inability to look for a source of income. Being humiliated gives us the ‘push’ to speak up and fight for ourselves to save our face from the next embarrassments. It may be a bitter experience, a friend’s tragic story, a great movie, or an inspiring book that will help us get up and get just the right amount of motivation we need in order to improve ourselves. With the countless negativities the world brings about, how do we keep motivated? Try on the tips I prepared from A to Z… A - Achieve your dreams. Avoid negative people, things and places. Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “the future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” B - Believe in your self, and in what you can do. C – Consider things on every angle and aspect. Motivation comes from determination. To be able to understand life, you should feel the sun from both sides. D – Don’t give up and don’t give in. Thomas Edison failed once, twice, more than thrice before he came up with his invention and perfected the incandescent light bulb. Make motivation as your steering wheel. E – Enjoy. Work as if you don’t need money. Dance as if nobody’s watching. Love as if you never cried. Learn as if you’ll live forever. Motivation takes place when people are happy. F – Family and Friends – are life’s greatest ‘F’ treasures. Don’t loose sight of them. G – Give more than what is enough. Where does motivation and self improvement take place at work? At home? At school? When you exert extra effort in doing things. H – Hang on to your dreams. They may dangle in there for a moment, but these little stars will be your driving force. I – Ignore those who try to destroy you. Don’t let other people to get the best of you. Stay out of toxic people – the kind of friends who hates to hear about your success. J – Just be yourself. The key to success is to be yourself. And the key to failure is to try to please everyone. K – keep trying no matter how hard life may seem. When a person is motivated, eventually he sees a harsh life finally clearing out, paving the way to self improvement. L – Learn to love your self. Now isn’t that easy? M – Make things happen. Motivation is when your dreams are put into work clothes. N – Never lie, cheat or steal. Always play a fair game. Stress is the curse of living in modern times. Everyone suffers from stress. And the stress we suffer takes a heavy toll on our bodies, emotions and minds. Feeling stressed out, worn out by fatigue or just simply having a miserable day, the best thing to do is relax. Watching television may be a form of relaxation for some, but is not a recommended method by experts. When we watch TV we are bombarded with commercials, ads, sounds and images. So how do we achieve relaxation? If there are thousands of ways we can get stressed, one of them is not meeting deadlines, there are also many ways we can relax. In recent studies, experts have determined that heart disease is linked to anger and irritability is linked to mental stress. Too much stress brings about ischemia that can lead to or cause a heart attack. Relaxation takes on added importance in light of this matter. Managing your anger and attitude is significant to heart health, and relaxation can help you manage stress. One way of relaxation is transcendental meditation. Recent studies have also shown that this method might reduce artery blockage, which is a major cause for heart attack and stroke. People practice transcendental meditation by repeating uttering soothing sounds while meditating, this is to achieve total relaxation. The researchers found that practitioners of transcendental meditation significantly reduced the thickness of their arterial wall compared with those who didn't practice transcendental meditation. Another study on another method of relaxation, acupuncture, seems to reduce high blood pressure by initiating several body functions for the brain to release chemical compounds known as endorphins. Endorphin helps to relax muscles, ease panic, decrease pain, and reduce anxiety. Yoga is also another method for relaxation and may also have similar effects like acupuncture. In another study, participants were subjected to several minutes of mental stress. Then they were subjected to various relaxation techniques, such as listening to nature sounds or classical music. Only those who did Yoga significantly reduced the time it took for their blood pressures to go back to normal. Yoga is a form of progressive relaxation. Breathing is one of the easiest methods to relax. Breathing influences alamost all aspects of us, it affects our mind, our moods and our body. Simply focus on your breathing, after some time you can feel its effects right away. There are several breathing techniques that can help you reduce stress. Another easy way to achieve relaxation is exercise. If you feel irritated a simple half-hour of exercise will often settle things down. Although exercise is a great way to lose weight, it does not show you how to manage stress appropriately. Exercise should also be used in conjunction with other exercise method. I am going to ask you to something very weird right now. First of all, I want you to listen to your thoughts. Now tell me, what thoughts fill your head? Would you label them as positive, or negative? Now let's say you are walking down the street with these thoughts. Do you think anyone who would meet you would be able to tell you what’s on your mind? The answer to number one is up to you. But, the answer number two can be pretty generic. Although people will not be able to tell you exactly what you think, they will more or less have an idea of how you are feeling. Here's another question. When you enter a party filled with friends, do they all fall silent as if something terrible had happened? Or does everybody there perk up as if waiting for something exciting to happen? You know what? The answer to all these depends on your frame of mind. Thoughts are very powerful. They affect your general attitude. The attitude you carry reflects on your appearance, too – unless, of course, you are a great actor. And it doesn't end there. Your attitude can also affect people around you. The type of attitude you carry depends on you. It can be either positive or negative. Positive thoughts have a filling effect. They are admittedly invigorating. Plus, the people around the person carrying positive thoughts are usually energized by this type of attitude. Negative thoughts on the other hand have a sapping effect on other people. Aside from making you look gloomy and sad, negative thoughts can turn a festive gathering into a funeral wake. A positive attitude attracts people, while a negative attitude repels them. People tend to shy away from those who carry a negative attitude. People are usually afraid of negative things. They are afraid of self-improvement because of this fear. Psychological self-improvement may help you in this situation. In psychological self-improvement, The best way to remove this fear is to understand that life is always in the cycle of ups and downs. No one is permanently up or permanently down. Remember that no one can avoid these ups and downs even the most envied Hollywood stars. What we should do about these downs is to learn from it and not to avoid it. We should learn how to handle our problems for our psychological self-improvement. Problems affect us every day. These problems bring us misery due to the fact that we have feelings. We should never loose hope in figuring out solutions to these problems. All we need is to learn how to overcome it and not to be overcome. Problems can never be overcome but we can learn from them. This is where Psychology plays an important role. Psychologists say that we should always be careful in our decisions concerning our problems. We should handle our problems properly and learn how to deal with it. Learning from mistakes helps us in preparing ourselves for psychological self-improvement There are a lot of myths about every event in our lives is due to pre-determined reason. Another belief says that what we encounter in our lives today is our preparation for other things that may come in our lives. To understand what may happen to us in the future, we must learn from the present. Be determined to improve your self esteem and you are on your way to great achievement. Do not let a low self esteem ruin your life. The way you think about yourself determines how you interact with others. What are some examples of low esteem aspects in you mind that you need improvement on? 1. Nothing you do seems to go right 2. You believe that most people do not like you. 3. You believe that you are not attractive. 4. You choose something and it turns out to be the worst one. 5. You are afraid to converse with others for fear that what you say might not make sense. 6. You feel swallowed up in a whirlpool of frustration. What’s wrong with you? Your thoughts, actually. Stop thinking that the world is closing in on you. Get determined to achieve what you desire. Stop blaming other people for your misfortunes. The world is not your problem, you are your own problem. From this moment on, begin the process of self esteem improvement. Think the right way and be determined to win, and win you will. Just remember that success never comes easily and that is why determination is its counterpart. There are particular moments in life that when you wish you could depend on anybody’s self improvement advice. But even if they gave it to you with the best intentions, in case anything goes wrong, you are always going to blame those persons. That is why specialists strongly advise you, every time you find yourself at a crossroads, to always take the decisions by yourself. The question arising is: how can we know how to take it and which is the best solution? No matter how young or old you are, you must have gotten to a point in your life when you have to take a big decision, which will probably affect your entire existence. There is no doubt that there are certain moments in life when you feel helpless and disoriented and believe you could use some self improvement advice in order to figure out how to proceed with your life. The answer is never simple. However, there is one self improvement advice that can be of great help and employed regularly will have great results. It is called meditation and it has been used for centuries in certain rituals and by ancients civilizations. Even in old and famous books, like the Bible, people are invited to meditate, to discover and fight the evil in us and by knowledge to gain control over our decisions and our lives. How do we proceed when meditating? First of all, you need to be away from any source of distraction. You cannot analyze your deepest feelings and thoughts and watch a movie at the same time. Secondly, you need to ask yourself a series of questions that will help you to better determine who you really are. The questions should relate to everyday aspects. What do you like doing? What are the three keys to self improvement and motivation? 1. INSPIRATION. Inspiration is critical to staying motivated and improving oneself. If you are not interested in your business, your motivation level will never be high and you will not be able to sustain interest for very long. Take an honest look at your inspiration level. Are you excited about going to work or is it an obligation? You would be surprised at the number of people who choose a business that looks good on paper, but in reality does not interest them in the least. These individuals will grow weary and uninterested pretty quickly because they have no inspiration or passion to sustain them during the difficult times they will encounter as a small business owner. If you do not like your work, then think how you can re-focus your small business to better match your needs. Or consider making a change entirely. Without inspiration, there will not be motivated to even try self improvement. 2. SETTING GOALS. Short and long-term goal setting is vital for any business owner. If you do not set goals, you would have no definite purpose on which path of self improvement to take. How could you possibly be motivated if you were unsure about the direction of your company? Take the time to put your goals in writing. A business plan may sound daunting, but it is really nothing more than goals, strategies, implementation and a budget. Write your own business plan and update it at least annually. Include “mini-goals” that can be accomplished in a matter of hours, days or weeks as well as the more ambitious “grand-goals” that may take years to complete. Refer to this plan throughout the year. There are a variety of self improvement articles available nowadays. You may be thinking that this is one of those, obviously. When you came the 40-year stage in your life, you will suddenly realize many things. You get to ask yourself questions. How will it be when I get to the end of my life? How do I feel about the life I lived? Then someone gave you some self improvement articles while telling you that it is not yet too late. Does that mean anything to you? You bet it does. The feeling of anxiety that will come next is just normal. Then you will feel confused because life had felt so good. You were happy, had a successful marriage, two wonderful kids, and a job you reasonably enjoyed. What was my problem? It was your class ceiling. The “practical” and fear-based side that had convinced you all along that your passion and dreams had died. Here are top ten shifts in perspective that can help you move your life to the next level. This self improvement article will assist you in breaking through your own glass ceiling to create the life you really want. 1. Give yourself permission to dream. You probably had no problem dreaming as a kid. What happened to your ability to imagine and dream about what you want and who you want to be? When was the last time you caught yourself daydreaming and appreciated it? 2. Stop looking outside yourself for happiness. Look inside. Increase your self-awareness. Get curious about who you are at the core. Cultivate and nurture a relationship with yourself. You have got to motivate yourself in order to motivate others. If you do not know how, then it is time to browse through some self improvement books on how to go about it. Read on a few self improvement books…Here are a few: 1. 21 Indispensable Qualities of Leadership: Becoming the Leader Others Will Follow John C. Maxwell Why do some people consistently inspire others to follow their lead? In this self improvement book, the author identifies these top traits as character, charisma, commitment, communication, competence, courage, discernment, focus, generosity, initiative, listening, passion, positive attitude, problem-solving, relationships, responsibility, security, self-discipline, servanthood, teachability, and vision. Maxwell breaks down leadership qualities into easy to understand character qualities. Character is what defines a leader, and these traits are what people of character have. A must-read for leaders in any position. 2. Discover Your Strengths Marcus Buckingham The self improvement book that helps you find what you are strong in and encourages you to work to make those stronger. That instead of working against what you know you're good at. You can also take the personal survey that is in the book. 3. Five Patterns of Extraordinary Careers Spencer Stuart A remarkable book about how to stand out from your peers and have a better career. One lesson learned: It is better to ask for forgiveness after the fact than it is to ask for permission ahead of time. 4. Who Moved My Cheese? Spencer Johnson Of course, what book list would be complete without this self improvement book that is all about change. Another book that is well worth the listen, but also worth reading. 5. 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Steven Covey Once you have decided on a self improvement course, you will face moments along your journey where it seems that you are not making progress toward your goal. It is but natural. Staying in the course when the results do not seem to be coming can be challenging. But then, you must not give up when you are pursuing a dream. Stay on your self improvement course. Do not jump overboard. If you believe in your dream and is willing to see it through, you will surely enjoy the sweet reward of success when you arrive at your destination. Below are four tips for staying the self improvement course. 1. Stay positive. Your mental attitude toward your situation is very important. If you think possibilities, you will be better able to focus on the opportunities that are present in setbacks or delays. Try to become your own dictator when you surrender your will to negative thoughts. Keep a positive attitude. You know that you have what it takes to succeed. Tell yourself to think thoughts that will lift your spirit and renew that desire to succeed. 2. Pull versus Push. It is not possible to push a rope. Neither can you make any progress by pushing and forcing it to move to your liking. Experts will tell you that you need to make yourself "attractive" so that you can effortlessly draw to yourself what you want in life. This will also move you away from seducing or pushing in order to produce the outcome that you desire. What have you been attracting to your life? Are you the one doing the pushing or the pulling? There are different books and seminars that can help you gather some self improvement guide. All these sources are against the negative factors in your life. This self improvement guide is intended to offer you the best solutions to eliminate these factors for good. Or at least to reduce it drastically. Work, meetings, deadlines, appointments, telephone calls, shopping, taking the dogs out etc. – all these are things most people have to accomplish daily. Most of the times, on the waiting list there are other things like: family, friends and even ourselves. Sometimes we discover too late that the points mentioned on the waiting lists are, in fact, the most important and, unfortunately, sometimes, we don’t realize this at all, so find ourselves wondering for what reason we are so unhappy. All this people know that time is more than money – time means, first of all, life and, more than that, it means our lives. That is way we have the obligation not to surrender in stressful situations and to go fighting for the joy of living. Let us not forget also that deficient management of time can produce tremendous health problems, both at the physical and mental level. But there is good news! Time can be domesticated – we can make it, in certain manner, obey us. First step in implementing this process is to identify the elements that robe your time. Normally, they are divided into two groups: There are a lot of programs that can aid you in your endeavors in having a healthy mental life. If you have a lot of things on your mind and simply want to have the easy way to deal with them helps with programs. Such programs show you the ways on how to be in the healthy line if mental life. They can be an accelerated transformative practice which the professionals can easily impose on your schedule. It can last for a year or longer, depending upon the program administrator. There are also lessons which you need to follow. Benefits of such programs can maximize your energy, lose weight, maintain good health, enhance your creativity, reduce stress , develop more fulfilling relationships, reach profound meditative states, discover a greater meaning in life, expanding your awareness, strengthen your immune system, take your spirituality to new levels. You can also find a greater sense of self, master universal dynamics and processes and become the person you want to be they take advantage of the current research and proven practices from nutrition, exercise and psychology to discoveries in the fields of relaxation and spirituality. most other self-help programs that focus on one system or philosophy, some are holistic - or big-picture - approach that addresses all aspects of a person's well-being. Most of them goes well beyond offering you the theories behind our programs to give you practical tools and activities to put the power of our programs to work in your life and these programs or lessons are easy to follow, quick to implement and fun to participate in. Audio self help tapes What are you? A leader or a follower? We can all become leaders and also followers. Both are important but the leader sets the good example for his/her followers. A good leader has a good follower. If you think you are not a good leader, maybe you should have a self-improvement seminar. Self-improvement seminar for leaders is training them to be good to the followers. There are a variety of self-improvement seminar for you. But leadership training seminar is the best for you. In order to be a great leader, one must possess various qualities that will attract followers. The following qualities are just of few of the many qualities that are vital for effective leadership: 1. Charisma- charismatic leaders have the gift to touch people through their choice of words. Charismatic leaders are alluring, charming and can encourage followers to support a grand vision or idea. 2. Positive Attitude - A leader who has a positive attitude will influence his/her followers to carry that same attitude. A good example of a leader with a positive attitude could be a parent or teacher. Mothers, fathers, or elementary teachers appear and are viewed as role models to the young children they are teaching and nurturing. Self improvement tapes help you to achieve your goal of quitting by detailed instructions. Full audio support can make a difference when you don’t have the time for lengthy therapy sessions and just don’t have the privilege of affording them. I have included some of the data’s which the tapes features and what it could do to help you along the way. Hypnosis is an amazing tool for self-help. There is nothing as pleasant as allowing yourself to sink into a nice and easy trance and meditation from hypnosis and guided imagery. This self-esteem hypnosis tape is dedicated to helping you gain control over your life and your health by just sitting back and allowing the guided imagery to lead you to a healthy life and general self-esteem. This self-esteem hypnosis tape is a safe and effortless way to aid in your goal to better health by inducing a trance state. It should be used at least a couple of times a day. It is important to find a quiet and secure place to listen to this hypnosis tape. It should never be played while operating a car and works best in complete isolation. Pets often find a trance inducing tool such as this self-help tape intriguing and will try and be part of it so make sure they are out of the room before listening. I would also suggest that you keep the room semi-dark for the best trance quality. Allow yourself not to work hard at “doing it right.” All you need to do is let yourself go and enjoy the meditation trance state that develops naturally. It cannot be denied that what works for one does not work for another. If what your friends say and what you read does not seem to inspire you to improve yourself, then it is time to consider self improvement videos. It cannot be denied that some people can better comprehend something when they see it on screen. That is the psychology behind these videos. Getting the focus of the person watching them like no other ways can do. The need for self improvement is now an issue many people are focusing on. There are already a lot of self improvement articles out there. Not only that, a lot of experts are also lending their talent and expertise in helping people develop themselves. With the internet came the easiest means of looking for self improvement advice from other people. For those who took pleasure in reading, they turn to articles and other forms of writing. But for those who just likes to sit back, see and listen, self improvement videos are the ones chosen. There are websites that are capable of providing you with all the self improvement videos that are necessary to get your commitment power out and utilize it to whichever change or improvement you want to make with your own person. These videos consist of information and exercises. When you start these readings and exercises, you will immediately feel the desired change inside yourself. And with repetition of the exercises the change or improvements will become automatic. Repetition is the key to a life long improvement of your personality. These videos are meant to aid in everlasting self-improvement and personal growth in all areas of life. Have you ever wished that your life could be a lot better and more fulfilling than the one you are in right now? Have a self improvement worksheet you can put your plans on to turn them into reality. Here are some of the things you have to plan out in your worksheet for a smooth sailing journey towards self improvement goal. Get up early. To be able to accomplish this and still avoid losing any precious sleep, you can go to bed just a half hour earlier to get up a half hour earlier than you usually do. What this got to do with self improvement? For different people the answer can vary slightly. To start with you need to fully awaken yourself and get rid of early morning sluggishness. After you are completely alert step outside of your house and watch the sunrise. Nothing like the view of a fresh morning to set you out on your self improvement destination. This simple but immensely satisfying act will lift your spirits and help with self improvement. If you are unable to do this, take a brisk walk, jog or run depending upon what you prefer and what you are physically capable of. Eat breakfast. To start your day out on the right foot and stay in keeping with your self improvement plan this is practically a necessity. You need the energy this will provide you with to accomplish your daily tasks. If you are overly pressed for time you might try cereal and milk or even a few pieces of fresh fruit would do. How do you know if a person is willing to attain self improvement? This is a question with no definite answer. It will all depend on the individual. Many people have goals, dreams or ambitions but do not know how to go about achieving them. They may have thought about what would make up self improvement and their ideal life, but have no idea how to even begin to make the plans and take the actions required to make them a reality. Some people have a vague idea on how to go about self improvement. These are the ones that believe that if only they had a better job, or had been given better opportunities, or met the love of their life, or whatever else, everything would be fine and they would be happy. They feel that their happiness or lack of happiness is decided by external factors and their thoughts and actions are of little consequence. Some believe that if only they had more money they could have whatever they want and be on their way to self improvement. They may have spent little time thinking about what they actually want from life, and do not really believe there is anything they can do to create their fuzzy version of utopia anyway, apart from buying more lottery tickets. Other people do not even know what they actually want from their lives and may even have little idea what would really makes them happy. They seem to just drift from day to day, week to week, month to month, and year to year, and do little more than just about get by. They may have seemingly secure jobs and be earning enough to live relatively comfortable lives. They seem happy enough and have no great ambition to achieve anything more from their lives than they currently have. Have you come across a person who is so naturally friendly that when you put him inside a room of strangers, he'll be friends with almost everyone in no time? We call such a people-person, someone unbelievably nice and charismatic that he can charm anyone into doing anything. A socially-empowered person achieves so much greatness, basically because of the people that catapult him to success. He earns the trust and all-out support of the people, whom he had helped before. He never runs out of help. He can do anything with the plethora of people behind him. All because he knows he maximizes his social potential! See, if you know your social skills and you make use of them, you will reach self-empowerment. Self-empowerment is making a general overhaul in your life and turning yourself into a happier and more successful person.If you can be one of those people-persons, then I can't see any reason why you will not succeed. You just have to know how to start. 1. Be genuine. Hypocrisy will just bring you all the way down. Be genuinely nice and interested to people. Once they perceive that you are Mr. Hypocrite with selfish intentions, you might as well say goodbye to self-empowerment. 2. Be the greatest listener that you can be. To earn the love and trust of the people, listen to their problems and sympathize with them. Do not just hear them out, listen to them with your heart. Make eye contact when the person talks to you. Listen as if every word matters, and it does. Brownie points when they find out that there is a confidante in you. 3. Laugh out loud. I do not mean that you force yourself to laugh for every joke cracked by someone, albeit you do not find it funny at all.This means finding humor in things and not being too darn serious. A person oozing with an awesome sense of humor attracts crowds and eventually, attracts success. 4. Don't forget yourself. In the process of fluttering around like a social butterfly, you might forget yourself, allowing everyone to push you over. Remember, love and value yourself before anyone else. If you deem yourself respectable and worthy of affection, people will flock to you and not trample on you. 5. Do random acts of kindness. Everything that happens to us happens in purpose. And sometimes, one thing leads to another. Instead of locking yourself up in your cage of fears and crying over past heartaches, embarrassment and failures, treat them as your teachers and they will become your tools in both self improvement and success. I remember watching Patch Adams – its my favorite movie, actually. Its one great film that will help you improve yourself. Hunter “patch” Adams is a medical student who failed to make it through the board exams. After months of suffering in melancholy, depression and suicidal attempts – he decided to seek for medical attention and voluntarily admitted himself in a psychiatric ward. His months of stay in the hospital led him to meeting different kinds of people. Sick people in that matter. He met a catatonic, a mentally retarded, a schizophrenic and so on. Patch found ways of treating his own ailment and finally realized he has to get back on track. He woke up one morning realizing that after all the failure and pains he has gone through, he still want to become the a doctor. He carries with himself a positive attitude that brought him self improvement and success. He didn’t only improved himself, but also the life of the people around him and the quality of life. Did he succeed? Needless to say, he became the best damn doctor his country has ever known. So, when does self improvement become synonymous with success? Where do we start? Take these tips, friends… *Stop thinking and feeling as if you’re a failure, because you’re not. How can others accept you if YOU can’t accept YOU? *When you see hunks and models on TV, think more on self improvement, not self pitying. Self acceptance is not just about having nice slender legs, or great abs. Concentrate on inner beauty. *When people feel so down and low about themselves, help them move up. Don’t go down with them. They’ll pull you down further and both of you will end up feeling inferior. *The world is a large room for lessons, not mistakes. Don’t feel stupid and doomed forever just because you failed on a science quiz. There’s always a next time. Make rooms for self improvement. *Take things one at a time. You don’t expect black sheep’s to be goody-two-shoes in just a snap of a finger. Self improvement is a one day at a time process. Have you ever been a coach to a neighborhood team? I know how it feels the first time I've coached a team of seven-year-old soccer kids and how much they can really test my patience, not to mention sanity as they run around kicking the ball like ants to a huge, white crumb. It feels strange at first, having to be stared at by a bunch of kids who they will know that I'm not the one in the field. Sounds wrong in a sense, right? But what is the dead about coaching? Coaching is all about being a, well, 'coach' in the corporate world of handlers, front-liners and even a couple of benchwarmers biding their time to be given a chance to perform. I know how that feels when I go back to my regular day job. Some players are just MVP material, and some of them are just to support the MVP's so why bother sticking around? It sounds ironic when they say 'there is no I in team', but even the underachievers can be sore losers as well. These are steps that can be done within the day, and no matter what, it takes determination to be a coach. 1. There is a WHOLE lot of talk these days about Corporate Team Building. There are many, many options: vacation packages, rope courses, on-going office games, ice-breakers, etc. Management can also purchase videos, books, and seminar packages to assist them in building up their organization into a team worthy of belonging. A little later I will give you some ideas of where you can go for information on these team-building tools. 2. The truth about motivation is waiting to be grasped! It is ripe and ready for you to put into action today. Don't settle for mind-numbing gibberish. Get practical in 3 small ways to begin looking forward to your alarm clock sounding off each morning before you huddle with the team. Statistics shows that about 75% of the people working today are unhappy with their current jobs. One reason is that their talents are wasted because it is not applicable for their current jobs. That’s just one problem. You might have unreasonable demands placed upon you. You have to work really long hours to get anywhere. The paths to promotion may be blocked. You can’t get to where you want to be because of the view that people have of you, your experience, or your performance in the job. Maybe a little self-improvement will help you out with that problem. You should know how to appreciate your job if you want to succeed in life. If you are always late to your job, maybe it will become the reason for your termination. Why don’t you try to wake up early or if you’re always experiencing traffic, try to find other route. Self-improvement of your habits will help you succeed. There might be criticism leveled against you that isn’t just. There could be too much politics or backstabbing, you have to grease the right palms to get ahead. The job may just not be what you expected. You were promised one thing, but it turned into something else. One thing that you should do about backstabbing is always retain your temper at the right level. Don’t try to argue with your officemates of it will be another reason for firing you. You have to get to the root of what is causing your unhappiness about where you are and what you’re currently doing. The easiest way is The Five Whys. Ask, “Why?” five times. “Oh, I’m not happy.” Well, why? “Because I got passed for a promotion.” Why was that? “Because they didn’t value the project I was working on.” Why not? “Because management changed and they changed the objectives.” Well, why was that? You really sort of drill down to the root cause and find out what the problem really is. Once you decide that you need a change - that's where the real fun begins. How to go about finding a new job or change careers completely. There’s another way of looking at, the Top Ten Signs That You Need a New Job. It’s a bit like a Letterman Top Ten. They’re a bit tongue-in-cheek, but there’s a bit of truth in all of them. Life is like a road. There are long and short roads; smooth and rocky roads; crooked and straight paths. In our life many roads would come our way as we journey through life. There are roads that lead to a life of single blessedness, marriage, and religious vocation. There are also roads that lead to fame and fortune on one hand, or isolation and poverty on the other. There are roads to happiness as there are roads to sadness, roads towards victory and jubilation, and roads leading to defeat and disappointment. Just like any road, there are corners, detours, and crossroads in life. Perhaps the most perplexing road that you would encounter is a crossroad. With four roads to choose from and with limited knowledge on where they would go, which road will you take? What is the guarantee that we would choose the right one along the way? Would you take any road, or just stay where you are: in front of a crossroad? There are no guarantees. You do not really know where a road will lead you until you take it. There are no guarantees. This is one of the most important things you need to realize about life. Nobody said that choosing to do the right thing all the time would always lead you to happiness. Loving someone with all your heart does not guarantee that it would be returned. Gaining fame and fortune does not guarantee happiness. Accepting a good word from an influential superior to cut your trip short up the career ladder is not always bad, especially if you are highly qualified and competent. There are too many possible outcomes, which your really cannot control. The only thing you have power over is the decisions that you will make, and how you would act and react to different situations. Wrong decisions are always at hindsight. Had you known that you were making a wrong decision, would you have gone along with it? Perhaps not, why would you choose a certain path when you know it would get you lost? Why make a certain decision if you knew from the very beginning that it is not the right one. It is only after you have made a decision and reflected on it that you realize its soundness. If the consequences or outcomes are good for you, then you have decided correctly. Otherwise, your decision was wrong. Take the risk: decide. Since life offers no guarantee and you would never know that your decision would be wrong until you have made it, then you might as well take the risk and decide. It is definitely better than keeping yourself in limbo. Although it is true that one wrong turn could get you lost, it could also be that such a turn could be an opportunity for an adventure, moreover open more roads. It is all a matter of perspective. You have the choice between being a lost traveller or an accidental tourist of life. But take caution that you do not make decisions haphazardly. Taking risks is not about being careless and stupid. Here are some pointers that could help you choose the best option in the face of life’s crossroads: The basics of setting a goal is an open secret known by top-caliber athletes, successful businessmen and businesswomen and all types of achievers in all the different fields. The basics of setting goals give you short-term and long-term motivation and focus. They help you set focus on the acquisition of required knowledge and help you to plan and organize your resources and your time so that you can get the best out of your life. Setting clearly defined short term and long term goals will enable you to measure your progress and achieve personal satisfaction once you have successfully met your goals. Charting your progress will also enable you to actually see the stages of completion leading to the actual realization of your goals. This eliminates the feeling of a long and pointless grind towards achieving your goal. Your self-confidence and level of competence will also improve as you will be more aware of your capabilities as you complete or achieve your goals. The basics of goal settings will involve deciding what you really want to do with your personal life and what short term and long term goals you need to achieve it. Then you have to break down goals into the smaller and manageable targets that you must complete in your way to achieving your lifetime targets. Once you have your list waste no time in tackling your goals. A good way to have a manageable list is to have a daily and weekly set of goals. By doing this you will be always in the position of going towards you life plan goals. Everyday will give you the opportunity to fulfill a certain goal giving you the feeling of accomplishment. Here are some pointers that should be taken into consideration in setting goals and achieving them. Attitude plays a very big role in setting and achieving your goals. You must ask yourself if any part of you or your mind holding you back towards completing your simplest goals? If there are any part of your behavior that is being a hindrance or puts your plans into disarray? If you do have problems in these areas then the immediate thing to do is to address this problem. Solutions may include a visit to a doctor or psychiatrist to control your emotions. Careers are made by good time management practice. Failing in a career is often attributed to bad time management. Careers require a lot from an individual which often makes the career the life of the individual. Plan how far do you want to go into your career. Education is key in achieving your goals. If your goals require you to have a certain kind of degree or require a certain specialization or demand a certain skill to be developed, make plans in getting the appropriate education. Relationships of all kinds are often perceived as very delicate things, that require extra effort to maintain. However, a relationship can also be something that can provide security and can also be long lasting despite many trials. Building an effective and lasting relationships is a necessity for several reasons. For example in a group or organization, the well being of the people depends on how efficient and effective that group or organization works. The group or organization is also dependent on how the members work well with the management. An ineffective group or organization can really be very frustrating. An effective group or organization can also ask so much on their members, that sometimes the members would be having no life outside the walls of the area where they work or sacrifice the other aspects of their life just to meet deadlines. For an organization or group with this kind of scenario, relationships can be stressed or suffer from breakdown. People or other entities who depend on these groups or organization also suffer. Society is defined as a web of relationships, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested, can make society work better. In this way each member works for the good of the whole and towards achieving a common goal. This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships. Understanding the other parties' feeling and position creates an effective and efficient relationship. The easiest method to understand what is important to another party is to ask them what they want and listen to what they have to say. When the other party realizes this, they would feel the importance given to them Effective and efficient relationships require parties to openly express their feelings and positions on all matters pertinent on the relationship. Assuming that the other party understands our needs and give us when we need it without asking for it is not a good practice. Respect is the key to relationship. In order to create a more effective relationship, parties should treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to the other party and by trying sincerely to understand how they function. You can also show respect to other parties by confirming that they are doing everything they can. People seem to have the misconception that only a select few are able to unleash a steady flow of creative genius. That is not true at all. The fact is, creativity is very much like a muscle that needs to be exercised in order to consistently give out great results. If you don't practice harnessing creative thinking, this skill will very much atrophy into inexistence. But keep working and this skill will soon come to you in a snap. So how do you unleash your creative thinking? Well, the first thing is to become a human leech. No, we're not talking about just sucking the blood out of every living being available, we're saying that you should take in as much knowledge and learning you can find. Read everything available -- good and bad, and keep your mind open to the infinite possibilities of the universe. The more you know, the more you'll want to know, and the more your faculty of wonder will be exercised. Prepare to be amazed at little facts that add a bit of color into your life. Focus on a creative activity everyday. Yes, it's an effort. Even doodling is a creative activity. Don't let anything hinder you. Mindlessness may be a creative activity, but for people who are just starting out to unleash a little bit of creative thinking in their lives, it is helpful and encouraging to have concrete evidence, that, "hey, what I'm doing is getting somewhere." So why don't you try it. Practice drawing for a couple of minutes each day. Bring out your old camera and start snapping photos like crazy. Keep a journal and make a point to write in it religiously. Another cool idea is to write by describing something with your five senses. Try to avoid vague adjectives like "marvelous," "amazing," and "delicious." Before you know it, you'll have built yourself a tiny portfolio, and you'll be amazed at the growth you've undertaken after amassing all those works of art. Who knows, you might actually take to liking those things you do everyday. Pretty soon those things will become a part of you and you'll be addicted to these creative exercises. When we look at a certain object, a painting for example – we won’t be able to appreciate what’s in it, what is painted and what else goes with it if the painting is just an inch away from our face. But if we try to take it a little further, we’ll have a clearer vision of the whole art work. We reach a point in our life when we are ready for change and a whole bunch of information that will help us unlock our self improvement power. Until then, something can be staring us right under our nose but we don’t see it. The only time we think of unlocking our self improvement power is when everything got worst. Take the frog principle for example – Try placing Frog A in a pot of boiling water. What happens? He twerps! He jumps off! Why? Because he is not able to tolerate sudden change in his environment – the water’s temperature. Then try Frog B: place him in a luke warm water, then turn the gas stove on. Wait til the water reaches a certain boiling point. Frog B then thinks “Ooh… it’s a bit warm in here”. People are like Frog B in general. Today, Anna thinks Carl hates her. Tomorrow, Patrick walks up to her and told her he hates her. Anna stays the same and doesn’t mind her what her friends says. The next day, she learned that Kim and John also abhors her. Anna doesn’t realize at once the importance and the need for self improvement until the entire community hates her. We learn our lessons when we experience pain. We finally see the warning signs and signals when things get rough and tough. When do we realize that we need to change diets? When none of our jeans and shirts would fit us. When do we stop eating candies and chocolates? When all of our teeth has fallen off. When do we realize that we need to stop smoking? When our lungs have gone bad. When do we pray and ask for help? When we realize that we’re gonna die tomorrow. The only time most of us ever learn about unlocking our self improvement power is when the whole world is crashing and falling apart. We think and feel this way because it is not easy to change. But change becomes more painful when we ignore it. Time management is basically about being focused. The Pareto Principle also known as the '80:20 Rule' states that 80% of efforts that are not time managed or unfocused generates only 20% of the desired output. However, 80% of the desired output can be generated using only 20% of a well time managed effort. Although the ratio '80:20' is only arbitrary, it is used to put emphasis on how much is lost or how much can be gained with time management. Some people view time management as a list of rules that involves scheduling of appointments, goal settings, thorough planning, creating things to do lists and prioritizing. These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop an efficient personal time management skill. These basic skills can be fine tuned further to include the finer points of each skill that can give you that extra reserve to make the results you desire. But there is more skills involved in time management than the core basics. Skills such as decision making, inherent abilities such as emotional intelligence and critical thinking are also essential to your personal growth. Personal time management involves everything you do. No matter how big and no matter how small, everything counts. Each new knowledge you acquire, each new advice you consider, each new skill you develop should be taken into consideration. Having a balanced life-style should be the key result in having personal time management. This is the main aspect that many practitioners of personal time management fail to grasp. Time management is about getting results, not about being busy. The six areas that personal time management seeks to improve in anyone's life are physical, intellectual, social, career, emotional and spiritual. The physical aspect involves having a healthy body, less stress and fatigue. The intellectual aspect involves learning and other mental growth activities. The social aspect involves developing personal or intimate relations and being an active contributor to society. The career aspect involves school and work. The emotional aspect involves appropriate feelings and desires and manifesting them. The spiritual aspect involves a personal quest for meaning. Thoroughly planning and having a set of things to do list for each of the key areas may not be very practical, but determining which area in your life is not being giving enough attention is part of time management. Each area creates the whole you, if you are ignoring one area then you are ignoring an important part of yourself. Much has been written about leadership: rules, pointers, styles, and biographies of inspiring leaders throughout world history. But there are certain leadership ideas that we ourselves fail to recognize and realize in the course of reading books. Here is a short list of things you thought you knew about leadership. 1. Leaders come in different flavors. There are different types of leaders and you will probably encounter more than one type in your lifetime. Formal leaders are those we elect into positions or offices such as the senators, congressmen, and presidents of the local clubs. Informal leaders or those we look up to by virtue of their wisdom and experience such as in the case of the elders of a tribe, or our grandparents; or by virtue of their expertise and contribution on a given field such as Albert Einstein in the field of Theoretical Physics and Leonardo da Vinci in the field of the Arts. Both formal and informal leaders practice a combination of leadership styles. · Lewin’s three basic leadership styles – authoritative, participative, and delegative · Likert’s four leadership styles – exploitive authoritative, benevolent authoritative, consultative, and participative · Goleman’s six emotional leadership styles - visionary, coaching, affiliative, democratic, pacesetting, and commanding. 2. Leadership is a process of becoming. Although certain people seem to be born with innate leadership qualities, without the right environment and exposure, they may fail to develop their full potential. So like learning how to ride a bicycle, you can also learn how to become a leader and hone your leadership abilities. Knowledge on leadership theories and skills may be formally gained by enrolling in leadership seminars, workshops, and conferences. Daily interactions with people provide the opportunity to observe and practice leadership theories. Together, formal and informal learning will help you gain leadership attitudes, gain leadership insights, and thus furthering the cycle of learning. You do not become a leader in one day and just stop. Life-long learning is important in becoming a good leader for each day brings new experiences that put your knowledge, skills, and attitude to a test. 3. Leadership starts with you. Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.” More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us.- when in reality, the fact is, most people are more scared than us. You spot a totally eye-catching girl sitting by herself at a party, casually sipping on a glass of Asti Spumanti. You think to yourself, “she looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could read thru her transparent mind, you would see a bunch of clouds of thoughts and you might just be amazed that she’s thinking “are people talking about why I am seated here alone?... Why don’t guys find me attractive? …I don’t like my ankles, they look too skinny… I wish I was as intelligent as my best friend.” We look at a young business entrepreneur and say “Wooh… what else could he ask for?” He stares at himself at the mirror and murmur to himself, “I hate my big eyes… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad would still work things out.” Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and thinks of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation. Sometimes, you notice that you have an irritating habit like biting off your finger nails, having a foul mouth, and you – of all people, is the last to know. I have a friend who never gets tired of talking. And in most conversations, she is the only one who seems to be interested in the things she has to say. So all of our other friends tend to avoid the circles whenever she’s around, and she doesn’t notices how badly she became socially handicapped – gradually affecting the people in her environment. We all have this favorite expression when it comes to being stressed out, and I wouldn't bother naming all of them since it may also vary in different languages. But when it comes down to it, I think that it is how we work or even relax, for that matter that triggers stress. Ever been stressed even when you're well relaxed and bored? I know I have. Since Error! Hyperlink reference not valid. is unavoidable in life, it is important to find ways to decrease and prevent stressful incidents and decrease negative reactions to stress. Here are some of the things that can be done by just remembering it, since life is basically a routine to follow like brushing your teeth or eating breakfast. You can do a few of them in a longer span of time, but as they say-- every minute counts. Managing time Time management skills can allow you more time with your family and friends and possibly increase your performance and productivity. This will help reduce your stress. To improve your time management: · Save time by focusing and concentrating, delegating, and scheduling time for yourself. · Keep a record of how you spend your time, including work, family, and leisure time. · Prioritize your time by rating tasks by importance and urgency. Redirect your time to those activities that are important and meaningful to you. · Manage your commitments by not over- or undercommitting. Don't commit to what is not important to you. · Deal with procrastination by using a day planner, breaking large projects into smaller ones, and setting short-term deadlines. · Examine your beliefs to reduce conflict between what you believe and what your life is like. Build healthy coping strategies It is important that you identify your coping strategies. One way to do this is by recording the stressful event, your reaction, and how you cope in a stress journal. With this information, you can work to change unhealthy coping strategies into healthy ones-those that help you focus on the positive and what you can change or control in your life. Lifestyle I'm sure you have a bright idea hidden somewhere in the back of your mind that you just can't wait to test out. Of course you're not the only one with the bright idea. So what motivates you to churn those creative, or even inspiring juices to its utmost flavor? It's always best to set up a personal goal where you can accomplish the most in record time, maybe like mowing the lawn in an hour before the big game on TV. A correct and positive attitude in whatever you do will make things easier, and even enjoyable. Here are some tips to make it through the week even if you're just sitting in your favorite couch. An idea takes time to form in your head and is always at work while you are busy sitting. Having a bit of positive thinking can help you realize things that are never thought possible. Thinking big is indeed the American Way and that what made our country prosperous. 1. Take passionate action towards living your life by design. Talk is cheap. Action = deposits in the bank of a passionately authentic future. Without it, passion is void. This is a perfect example where dreams are made of where you start by tinkering with your mind, then with your hands. And if the idea weakens, you can always go back to it later until you finish it. I seem to lost count on how many times I've read and heard of celebrity marriages failing almost left and right. Not that I care (and personally I don't), it seems strange that we often see movie and TV stars as flawless people, living the fairytale life of riches and glamour. I suppose we all have to stop sticking our heads in the clouds and face reality. There are many ways to lose your sense of self-esteem despite of how trivial it could get. But whatever happens, we should all try | ||